A Thousand Words
Public Nudity

Hey Jimmy, Do You Like Candy?

I see a day coming when a new form of child predator emerges.

"...Well officer, I didn't get a good look at the guy, but, as he lead the kid away, I heard him say something about needing the DNS on his router reconfigured. I bet he's got Jimmy backing up his MySQL database as we speak!!! Please officer, please find Jimmy before that bad man makes him do something really terrible!!! I think he's gonna try to make Jimmy convert table-based web pages to CSS!!!!"

I remember being young... and... y'know... able to figure stuff out.

By age eleven, while my father was still trying to figure out how to format a floppy disk, I already knew how to program in BASIC. Where have the years gone?

Every time I call webhosting tech support, I find myself talking to a teenager who speaks to me like I'm an idiot... most likely because, by comparison, I'm an idiot.

I honestly believe man would have landed on Mars by now if only child labor laws didn't prevent NASA from hiring fourteen year olds.

* * * * * * * * * *

"Hey, Jimmy, do you like candy? Do you like doing IP tracerouts? What do you know about SSL Ports and IMAP Servers? How are you with upgrading MT 2.65 to 3.2? Can you program in PERL? Hey! Where are you going! NO no no... don't walk away!!! I've got candy!! CANDY I tell you!!! CANDY!!!"


"I wasn't going to share my candy with you anyway!!!"

Fucking kids these days.

"Can you at least look over my CGI script?"